I’ve been married twice. My first husband died.
You know how you don’t know what you don’t know until you experience it?
I didn’t know how unconnected I was in my first marriage.
I had doubts about getting married; everyone told me it was normal. Maybe.
Or maybe the right man was living right down
Siskiyou Blvd and I should run to him. Quickly.
Gain a dozen great years with my destiny!
My first marriage wasn’t a “bad” marriage. I continued my
years-of-living-alone ways and didn’t know what I didn’t know.
We argued in unsatisfying ways, often never getting to the other side of issues.
I many ways I was unhappy, but didn’t know why exactly.
I kept working on myself, a Buddhist pathway.
I met Mitchell nine months after Bob dropped dead.
Mitchell walked in my front door to find me.
I knew and he knew and we were together within days, non-stop,
giddy with having found each other, and have been inseparable ever since.
As we grew toward each other with joy, overcoming the incredible hurls thrown at us,
I began to know what I didn’t know in my first marriage.
I can BE myself with him — almost as I am in private.
I don’t need to retreat —
I can be in creative mode with him hanging around doing whatever.
We can disagree and come to resolution. Usually without even fighting about it.
Forgiveness comes easily.
His happiness is, in many ways, more important to me than mine.
I don’t mean I lose myself in him;
I want him to be treated well, to be loved, to be cherished as I cherished him.
I want his dreams to come to fruition.
All the corny lines from all the corny love songs make me think of him,
and I don’t mind that he changes the words to every great love song into
silly squirrel songs that I can’t get out of my head.
( I draw the line at Andrea Bocelli.)
I sing the demanding-coffee-chant to move him to get up with me in the morning,
and after working all day together,
the best-time-of-the-day is curling up in bed together.
Our wedding rings are cherished because of what they symbolize!
I am a big believer in
signs and rituals.
Early in our living together, our ritual
coffee pot, the one
over which many of our first coffee songs
were sung, broke — just before a momentous
life change for us.
“Oh NO,” I wailed,
“Its a sign!”
“Yes,” Mitchell said,
“Its a sign we need a
new coffee pot.”
(I learned not to put symbolism in fragile
glass press pots.)
This pragmatism is a good thing in him, because when I first stepped into arthritis
and could not wear my rings, he said, “Its a sign that you have arthritis!”
I took my rings off and began wearing them in a silk pouch around my neck. Always.
Now he has some of the same in his joints. I added his ring to mine around my neck.
As we realize our hands will never be the same size again,
we are having a ritual resizing of the rings this week. It’s a sign of a happy marriage.
OM is the primordial sound of happiness.
Cherished Blogfest 2016 July 29, 30, 31! Want to join? Tell us about a
cherished object — 500 words or less, and no, you don’t have to paint…
Then sign the Linky List so we can come visit you!
#CBF16 is our hashtag.
Moleskin 8×11 watercolor journal, Pentalic HB woodless pencil, Platinum Carbon pen, Lamy Al-Star, Noodler’s, De Atramentis Document, and Super5 inks;
and Greenleaf & Blueberry, Sennelier, Holbein, QoR and Daniel Smith watercolors.
©D. Katie Powell.
My images/blog posts may be reposted; please link back to dkatiepowellart
D.Katie Powell Art 
Reblogged this on Zenkatwrites's Blog and commented:
Last year I was new to Cherished Blogfest; this year I did my posting through art on dkatiepowellart. You are welcome to join in the fun. Follow the linky list on my post!
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Now this was a lovely post, and one that I can relate to completely. A beautiful story, Kate. So happy that you finally found each other. God bless you both!
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Thanks Wendy, for the compliment and the blessing.
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I think wedding rings are so special. I and Sarah decided to go with simple wedding bands rather than going fancy because it signifies our simple and pure love.
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Kate – I laughed out loud when I read “Its a sign we need a new coffee pot” It’s so wonderful to read about your love for each other. Clearly, you guys belong together. I love the fact that you can describe this and love and illustrate it for us.
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Thanks Dan. It is a thing with us, and yes, we do and we know how very lucky we are….
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Beautiful words … And sketches
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Thanks Carmel!
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What a love story! And I love your art work and your exuberance–that shines through. How can you not follow love, exuberance and great art?! Yes, I shall. See you at the bar on Saturday.
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Next Saturday, that is…. and thanks! And the bar we meet at is Dan’s at this blog: https://nofacilities.com/
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you got it!
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How many times can I like this blog post?! I love your artwork, Kate and your heartfelt sentiment. What a beautiful marriage you have.
p.s. Try Collagen Hydrolysate for the arthritis. Great Lakes makes a good product.
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Thank you Pam. I have a huge question for you: I’ve stopped using any kind of bovine products unless organic since Mad Cow (and those that say it can’t happen, it happened within miles of us in Portland Oregon.) I finally gave up on USDA and FDA approvals and decided ot research my own stuff for safety. Do you have any info on this in terms of the collagen and gelatin products?
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Fabulous account of two soulmates coming together! This post exudes happiness.
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Thanks Debbie!
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You found true love, one of the most illusive things on this planet. I’m happy you did.
I felt it when you said that you now wear the rings in a silk pouch around your neck. It shows the depth of your love, the gratitude and the humbleness of your heart. I’m grateful to have read it. Thanks Kate!
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You are welcome! Lucky, yes. Glad it came through too.
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Finding someone you can be yourself with is so important. What a nice, inspiring post! Glad to hear you’re so happy together. Thanks for sharing, Kate.
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Thanks Paul (the man who taught me it is Rod Serling….)
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What a heartwarming post. I absolutely loved reading it. Thank you.
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Thank you so much!
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Pingback: 2016 World Watercolor Month: Last Day | D.Katie Powell Art
Perfect Kate. How well I understand this closeness. You are both blessed to have finally found yourselves with and through one another. Thanks for sharing your history. Good luck with the ring sizing. Your art…..phenomenal. I love it.
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Thanks Cheryl… I get that you have it too. I’ve LOVED this blogfest!
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Beautiful post, Kate! I love that you started wearing the rings around your neck! Great idea. I adore the art in your post – I am very fond of watercolor and the ones you posted are gorgeous. I am so very glad you found your soulmate. You are right about not knowing what we don’t know until we experience it. And i think it is a lovely surprise when that happens! Hugs! Very happy to meet you! Thanks for coming by my blog – please do link up with the Gratitude Circle bloghop!
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Thank you Vidya. Very happy to meet you as well.
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This is incredible, Kate! It is like someone else has written my own story (except I was divorced). Your words are so true: “I didn’t know what I didn’t know”! Thank you so much for sharing this!
Donna
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Thanks Donna!
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Great post and love your watercolors. 🙂
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Thanks!
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If there was a “love” button, I’d press it. Katie, you and Mitchell are so blessed to have found one another. I understand the “I don’t know what I don’t know,” as I realized many things about my marriage when I left it. I can only hope that someday I’ll have the opportunity to meet my Mitchell and feel as cherished about two rings as you do. Wonderful post! ❤
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I wish that for you also. I think I may have to tell the story of how I did magic to make him appear….
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A lovely story. And I like the illustrations 🙂 Thanks for sharing.
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Thanks!
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Yes we do. I agree this has been a reat experience!
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Beautiful post. Signs and rituals are important. Especially when they remind us of a special someone.
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What a beautiful story, and art to go with it! Your rings are lovely and so unique.
I lost my wedding band 2 yrs ago or close to it. We were sick about it for months. I bought another band to replace it after several months of it not turning up. I had come to the reality that it was GONE FOREVER. 😦
Nearly a year later when I selected a t-shirt from a folded stack in my closet my original wedding band fell to the floor! It must have fallen off when I was folding clothes and putting them away!
We were overjoyed, and couldn’t believe it turned up!
It’s too big for me so I rarely wore it, and the last time I did it slipped off my finger. I don’t want to ever lose it again!
I wear the newer one when I remember to put it on, but it never has had the same feelings as my original band.
I never thought of wearing it around my neck! What a great way to wear it until you had it resized.
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I have a similar story about my grandmother’s amethyst ring. She gave it to me, and I cherished it, then it disappeared. My mom and I tore my bedroom apart, and could not find it. I was sick — at 16 to have lost something — not like me. Turn out it had somehow fallen into a fold in a prom-type dress in my closet, and a year later when i was packing for college it fell out on the floor of my closet!
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I regret it has taken me so long to read your post. I am a slow reader and there are so many great ones here. Your story is beautiful, really. How fortunate you are that you found a soul mate that was an instant and so lasting experience.
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So sweet Fran — sometimes it takes me a long time to read posts (I leave them up on my puter!)
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